Category Archives: Baseball

The Hoover Award

Back in 2007 I came up with a term for a baseball statistic I had never seen anywhere else. I called it the Hoover Award. As one might guess from the name, if one is familiar with the brand of vacuum cleaners, it’s all about the greatest amount of suckage. The team each year that finishes dead last in their league, using the win-loss percentage.

I realized due to the World Series this year, it was time to head on over to the Baseball-Almanac, and update my statistical research, so I now have a list of the number of Hoovers each team has won between 1973-2013. (I originally researched back to 1973, as that is how far back I had to go until there was ‘one team left standing’ in each league. I then researched how far I’d have to go back until those two teams finished dead last. The results might surprise you.)

A few notes:

1) I don’t list the Montreal Expos, as they no longer exist. The two “Hoover Awards” for the Washington Nationals are post-1995.
2) I list the Milwaukee Brewers in the National League, as that is where they are currently, but I count their suckage in both leagues. They have finished last in both leagues (1984 and 2002) so that isn’t an issue.
3) I list the Houston Astros in the American League, where it is as of 2013, but I count their suckage in both leagues. They won the American League Hoover Award this year, so that isn’t an issue.
4) Some may notice there are 39 Hoover Awards for the National League – and not the expected 40. I skipped over 1981 because I didn’t know how to appropriately handle the strike-split year for this statistic. There are more than 40 American League Hoover Awards because there were some ties.

American League 1973-2013

Tampa Bay Devil Rays 6
Seattle Mariners 6
Minnesota Twins 6
Detroit Tigers 5
Houston Astros 5
Toronto Blue Jays 4
Cleveland Indians 3
Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim 2
Baltimore Orioles 2
Oakland Athletics 2
Chicago White Sox 1
Kansas City Royals 1
New York Yankees 1
Texas Rangers 1
Boston Red Sox 0

National League 1973-2013

Pittsburgh Pirates 7
Chicago Cubs 5
San Diego Padres 5
Atlanta Braves 4
New York Mets 4
Philadelphia Phillies 3
Florida Marlins 3
Washington Nationals 2
Milwaukee Brewers 2
Cincinnati Reds 1
Los Angeles Dodgers 1
San Francisco Giants 1
Arizona Diamondbacks 1
Colorado Rockies 0
St. Louis Cardinals 0

I conducted single-team research on both the Red Sox and the Cardinals

  • The last time the Boston Red Sox finished dead last in the American League – 1933
  • The last time the St. Louis Cardinals finished dead last in the National League – 1918

The Rockies have only been around since 1993. Twenty years without falling victim to the annual vacuum cleaner is impressive, especially for an expansion team, but give them time.

All-Star Game Prediction – American League

As I posted last year, my whereabouts the evening of the All-Star game have correlated with the winner for nineteen years. The National League has only won if I was home. Once is a fluke. Twice is a coincidence. Nineteen times in a row? (I said 20 last year, but either I miscounted, or rounded up.)

This all began in 1996 when I joined a writer’s group that met on Tuesday nights, and the National League started losing the All-Star game. Of course, in 1994 and 1995 the National League won, and I am fairly certain I was home watching the game those two years. I don’t have evidence for this, but the odds are relatively certain.

In 2010, the Writer’s group switched to Mondays. And guess what happened? I was home, and the National League won! And they continued to win in 2011 and 2012. So, starting in 1994, and for 19 years, my whereabouts have correlated with the winner.

Alas, the group switched back to Tuesdays. I won’t be home tomorrow.

I am rooting for the National League for two reasons.

1) Because I always root for the National League. I am a St. Louis Cardinals fan; they are a National League team; I root for the National League.

2) If the National League wins this year, there is finally proof that my whereabouts are unrelated to the final game result. That will be a wonderful feeling. I will never again feel guilty that I wasn’t home on All-Star game night. Rationally, I know that there can be no real causation between my whereabouts and who wins. But irrationally, the evidence keeps piling up year after year that I am the cause.

But, alas, if I have to make a prediction, judging from past history, I’d have to predict the American League. Of course, my history of predictions hasn’t actually been very good. May that continue. (I need to update that 2005 post on my predictions, but I suspect my record hasn’t improved by much since then.)

Update: The American League won. 3-0. However, I decided to stay home and watch the game. Therefore, I am not responsible for the American League winning. I no longer live in an irrational world; my All-star Game Albatross has flown away and shall bother someone else in the future.

NL Wins again!

For those keeping track – I was home last night.

For the 20th year in a row – my whereabouts during the All-Star game have correlated with whether or not the National League won. Don’t get me wrong – I know this is correlation, and not causation. But it’s a strong correlation, is it not? It’s as if I’ve flipped a coin 20 times, calling heads or tails beforehand, and each time I’ve been right.

You may not believe that I am impacting the results in any fashion, but aren’t you at least slightly curious about next year’s coin toss?

All-Star Game Results

I’m a couple days late in posting this, but the National League has now won two years in a row.

As I posted last year, my weekly writer’s group, that used to meet on Tuesday nights, switched to Mondays. Finally providing me the opportunity to watch the game. It’s the simplest explanation from my perspective.

I suspect a few people may wonder whether or not I watched the game, since it’s Friday morning. Did he just discover that the All-Star game happened? What could possibly distract me that much from the All-Star Game? As I mentioned in last year’s post, I was home on Tuesday night.

That seems to be enough for the NL to win.

For St. Louis Baseball fans (for Coloradoans and Bostonians, too)

Yes…it is all but certain…within the next few days we will be eliminated mathematically from the playoffs.

Those disconsolate fans upset with the way the Cardinals collapsed, and who once again are swearing they will never root for the Cardinals again — read my post from last year.

St. Louis, Boston and Colorado are each adding another year to their streaks of avoiding the annual Baseball Vacuum Cleaner.
If I had to guess, it looks like Pittsburgh and Seattle are this year’s Hoover Award winners. Nothing unusual about that in either city. However, the season isn’t over.

I know. Bragging about not finishing last place isn’t exactly what every fan dreams about. However, we haven’t finished last since 1918. Boston hasn’t finished last place since 1933. And Colorado hasn’t done it yet (give them time.) Every other team has done it at least once since 1973.

The National League Won the All Star Game…how did it happen?

I’ve blogged before that the National League started losing in 1996 — when I joined a weekly writer’s group that met on Tuesday nights. That is…in every year I failed to watch the All-Star game, the National League lost.

So what happened this year?

The writer’s group moved their meetings to Monday in February.

I should have seen this coming.

(Jedi Hand Wave: My plane brought me back home tonight from vacation in ample time for me to watch the game. The mere possibility I may have found something to do other than watch the game shouldn’t be considered.)

Perspective – a Hoover Awards Update

I have lots of friends who are saying things like “I hate Baseball, I need to find another sport.”

I know they don’t really mean it. They’ll be cheering in the stands come April. I’m also disappointed with a 3-game post-season. However…I’m not sure if all of them realize how truly spoiled the St. Louis Baseball Fan is.

So I’ve updated the statistics I researched a couple years ago. I call these The Hoover Awards, because it’s the number of times a baseball team has sucked so badly, they finished dead last in their league in the final Regular Season Standings.

[I haven’t seen this statistic anywhere else, which is why I originally researched it back in 2006.]

I’ve only researched back to 1973. And the only reason for that year, is that is the year I have to research back to so that there is “One team left standing” in the American League. There are two teams left standing in the National League, but only because the Colorado Rockies have only been playing since 1993, and haven’t succumbed yet to the baseball vacuum cleaner.

A couple notes:
1) I don’t list the Montreal Expos, as they no longer exist. The two “Hoover Awards” for the Washington Nationals are post-1995.
2) I list the Milwaukee Brewers in the National League, as that is where they are currently, but I count their suckage in both leagues. They have finished last in both leagues (1984 and 2002) so that isn’t an issue.

American League 1973-2009

Tampa Bay Devil Rays 6
Seattle Mariners 5
Detroit Tigers 5
Toronto Blue Jays 4
Minnesota Twins 4
Cleveland Indians 3
Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim 2
Baltimore Orioles 2
Oakland Athletics 2
Chicago White Sox 1
Kansas City Royals 1
New York Yankees 1
Texas Rangers 1
Boston Red Sox 0

National League 1973-2009

Pittsburgh Pirates 6
Chicago Cubs 5
San Diego Padres 5
Atlanta Braves 4
New York Mets 4
Philadelphia Phillies 3
Florida Marlins 2
Washington Nationals 2
Houston Astros 2
Milwaukee Brewers 2
Cincinnati Reds 1
Los Angeles Dodgers 1
San Francisco Giants 1
Arizona Diamondbacks 1
Colorado Rockies 0
St. Louis Cardinals 0

The last time the Boston Red Sox finished dead last in the American League – 1933
The last time the St. Louis Cardinals finished dead last in the National League – 1918

It’s been 91 years since the Cardinals were the worst team in the National League.
No other team in baseball can make a similar claim.

There must be some reason I’m doing it.

I’m not a fan of Atlanta sports due to not living in or near Atlanta.
I’m not much of a fan of Hockey either.
I’m really a one-sport one-team guy, and my team is headed for the post-season, and here I am posting a video from the website of a non-St. Louis non-baseball team.

There must be some reason I’m doing it.

Go Cardinals!

All-Star Game prediction

My method of predicting the all-star game is slightly different from my method of predicting other major sporting events. The numbers the players have on their jerseys is irrelevant.

If I watch the game: the National League has a chance of winning
If I don’t (like I haven’t post-1996): The American League will win.

Bet on the American League. My weekly writer’s group still meets on Tuesdays.

April is National Poetry Month

April is National Poetry Month. In 2006 we attempted to post a poem every day, but got distracted after 11 days. In 2007 we made it through the entire month, to the dismay of a couple readers who complained near the end that they were anxious for something ‘different’. (But hopefully I introduced them to a few poets or poems that they enjoyed.)

And here we go again! My own personal guarantee is that no poem will be posted this April that I posted in prior Aprils. Even if that means I have to start sharing my own poetry (which I don’t think it will.)

Since Opening Day for the Baseball season was yesterday, this poem seems very appropriate, title and all. (Though of course, for the Cardinals, tonight is opening night since our game yesterday was rained out. And every fan will know Albert Pujols hit one more homer than the final tallies will declare, and Rick Ankiel’s 2-run double won’t count either. Sigh. April is the cruellest month.)

Line-Up for Yesterday:An ABC of Baseball Immortals
by Ogden Nash

A is for Alex
The great Alexander;
More Goose eggs he pitched
Than a popular gander.

B is for Bresnahan
Back of the plate;
The Cubs were his love,
and McGraw his hate.

C is for Cobb,
Who grew spikes and not corn,
And made all the basemen
Wish they weren’t born.

D is for Dean,
The grammatical Diz,
When they asked, Who’s the tops?
Said correctly, I is.

The rest of the poem

Here are the last six lines from a poem by a potentially surprising poet

The best times you’ve had
Have been with your Mom and your Dad
And a bat and a ball and a glove.

From the first time you played
Till the last time you prayed
It’s been a simple matter of love.

365 by Jack Buck (delivered on air, date unknown)