"Thank you for writing." - Joseph Heller
"America needs your continued leadership, courage and passion." - Gary Hart
An occasionally thoughtful, often warped, sometimes poet. A chapbook of such poetry can be found here.
This applies only to my commentary. Any quoted work of other authors are not included in this license unless directly specified.
On Dec 16th I mentioned rumors of Harry Potter Book Six being near completion.
While I was gone, JK Rowling made her announcement. Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince is due out July 16, 2005. It’s already the #1 bestseller on Amazon.
The fourth movie (Goblet of Fire) will be released in theaters 4 months later (Nov)
Odi:
11.27 ≠ 12. Not in any mathematical universe I am aware of.
You might think, “What’s a mere .73? No one in their right minds would complain about so small a difference. But the difference is significant, trust me.
What am I talking about? Soda cans. The metric system steals .73 ounces from the loyal soda drinker. How? Simple. 1/3 of a liter = 11.27 ounces. It’s as close as they can get to the standard 12 oz US can in the metric system with a “logical” metric unit. They could have used .35 liters, which is 11.835 ounces, or even .36 liters, which is 12.173, which would have gifen the metric consumer a benefit. But neither 7/20 of a liter, nor 9/25 of a liter really make any sense. So they used 333 ml, or 1/3 of a liter.
These soda cans look small. If there was a six pack of 11.27 ounce cans next to a six pack of 12 ounce cans, I doubt there’s anybody on this earth who would buy the 11.27 ounce cans. (Assuming the price per ounce was equivalent.)
Sure…it’s kind of nice to know that 1 sixpack is exactly equivalent to a 2 liter bottle, but that’s about the only thing that can be said in its favor. (And the 2 liter bottle is a strange anomaly in the US…one of the few things we buy in metric units)
2 liters, by the way, is 67.628 Ounces. A US sixpack is 72 ounces. So there’s 4.372 extra ounces of soda in every US sixpack compared to a European Metric sixpack.
The significance of this difference was easily detectable on the grocery store shelves of the British Caribbean island I recently vacationed at by one fact alone: They sold beer in 12 oz cans. Your loyal beer drinker will absolutely refuse to accept anything less. Soda drinkers are forced to suffer.
Amo
I am back from my vacation.
I may have some things to say about that vacation later, such as why I have an odi et amo relationship with the Metric system.
Megapoints to those who know who wrote the poem “Odi et Amo”, and what it means. (Latin is as dead as dead can be. First it killed the Romans, now it’s killing me.)
Ego booster of the day: Someone from the Council on Foreign Relations emailed me asking for the source of a Victor Hugo quote. I have no clue where he said it…or even if it is correctly attributed to him, but it’s a cool quote:
“The future has many names
For the weak it is unattainable
For the fearful it is unknown
For the bold it is opportunity”
I have 10 gmail invitations to hand out. Those who want them should email me directly (don’t ask me in the comments). Send me an email at gavroche at gmail dot com.
Update
I found a French blog that has the quote in French. So unless they found it in English, and translated it back into French, it suggests French is its original language, and there’s a good chance this isn’t a misattribution.
Le futur a beaucoup de noms: Pour ceux qui sont faibles il est l’inaccessible. Pour ceux qui sont craintifs il est l’inconnu. Pour ceux qui sont courageux il est l’occasion.
Google translates this as “Future A much of names: For those which are weak it is the inaccessible one. For those which are apprehensive it is the unknown. For those which are courageous it is the occasion.” This is about as close as one would expect from a computerized translation.
Target has banned the Salvation Army Santas from in front of their stores. They say if they let any not-for-profits solicit, they have to allow all. Christian groups are spreading the gossip that it was due to homosexual activism.
I haven’t given a penny to the santas this year because I don’t support the Salvation Army Mission
The Salvation Army was founded as an evangelical organization dedicated to bringing people into a meaningful relationship with God through Christ. Its doctrinal basis is that of the Wesleyan-Arminian tradition. It is composed of persons who are united by the love of God and man, and who share the common purpose of the organization - to motivate all people to embrace the salvation provided to them in Christ.
The word “army” indicates that the organization is a fighting force, constantly at war with the powers of evil. Battles are effectively waged through an integrated ministry that gives attention to both body and spirit. It is a total ministry for the total person. The Army cooperates with churches of all denominations to meet the needs of the community.
Those who have drifted away from God and those estranged from their own religious affiliations are often attracted to The Salvation Army. The are first urged to seek Christ for pardon and deliverance from sin. Then they are encouraged to return to active memberships in their own churches or to enroll as soldiers in a corps community center. Young people often are attracted through local music groups, youth camps, and recreational centers.
Target would probably have raised even more eyebrows by saying “If we allow the Salvation Army to solicit in front of our stores, we would have to allow every church, synagogue and coven in the area to solicit in front of our stores.” But it would have been a legitimate argument. The Salvation Army is a church, not a charity.
My cab arrives in 20 minutes. Happy Holidays all.
One day at kindergarten a teacher said to the class of 5-year-olds:
“I’ll give $2 to the child who can tell me who was the most famous man who ever lived.”
An Irish boy put his hand up and said: “It was St. Patrick.”
The teacher said, “Sorry Sean, that’s not correct.”
Then a Scottish boy put his hand up and said: “It was St. Andrew.”
The teacher replied, “I’m sorry, Hamish, that’s not right either.”
Finally, a Jewish boy raised his hand and said: “It was Jesus Christ.”
The teacher said, “That’s absolutely right, Marvin, come up here and I’ll give you the $2.”
As the teacher was giving Marvin his money, she said: “You know Marvin, you being Jewish, I was very surprised you said Jesus Christ.”
Marvin replied: “Yeah. In my heart I knew it was Moses, but business is business…”
I received this in my email a few minutes ago:
Aloha,
I am an historical archaeologist working in Hawaii. I have excavated some light green bottle sherds that are embossed on the base ìROYAL BRITISH NAVY …î (around the base perimeter) and have an indiscernible word horizontally across the base diameter. I am looking for any help your most knowledgeable person might be able to provide in locating someone who could identify this bottle. I would really appreciate it.
How did I become an expert on the Royal British Navy?
I actually think I know the answer. I wrote that article for the “Official Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy” 4 years ago. She thought because I wrote it, I was an expert. Err, lady, this is a ‘guide’ written by fans of Douglas Adams ranging from age 12 on up. Don’t trust the information you see there completely, and no, we’re not experts.
I did a quick google search, found the Royal British Navy’s website, found the address for their historical museum, and provided her with the information suggesting she contact them. I tried to be as polite as possible without implying I thought she was a freaking idiot. But oh, how I wanted to.
her name and email address have naturally been removed from above.
Christy created her own religion, so I decided to create mine. You can create yours here.
If one remembers Mad Libs…that’s basically the format of the script. And the below are my results.
In the beginning God created the computer and the God. The God was without books and green. Then God said let there be marijuana and there was marijuana. And God saw the marijuana, that it was fresh. On the 6th day God created the first man, Jerry Garcia. And God saw Jerry Garcia, that he was sticky. God then took one of Jerry Garcia’s arms and made the first woman, Victor Hugo. And God said you shall not eat of the redwood tree of leather whip for if you do you shall surely crash. But unfortunately a wily dolphin tricked Victor Hugo into eating of the redwood tree of leather whip while God wasn’t looking. He eventually found out and kicked them out of the garden. Jerry Garcia and Victor Hugo then had two sons, Cane and Able. Cane was a hugger of vampires, while Able was a herder of owls. Cane then gave God an offering of scrumptious elves and Able gave Him an offering of boxes. But God really preferred the boxes so Cane tastefully forgot Able in the fields. For that God cursed Cane to hug vampires forever.
I’m slightly worried what exactly this says about me.
I have two domains that are currently down. Two separate hosts. (obviously, not this one.)
I mean down down. I log on to the hosts’ control panels and find no files whatsoever.
Neither emailed me prior to shutting down my services to say: “Houston, we’ve got a problem.” That would have been nice customer service if they had.
Of course all my files are backed up, but I leave town tomorrow for a week and a half (as I’ve noted below). So unless I can work things out with them today, and they have a backup to restore the files, the files won’t be retored for a week and a half.
Of course, I pay more to the host for this domain, and it stays up.
Last year on December 18th, I posted a msg saying I was going to the Caribbean starting on Dec 19th and ending on Dec 30th.
Well, that’s not happening this year. This year I leave on December 17th and return on Dec 29th. (Those good at math may notice I am actually spending an extra day in the Caribbean this year. Woohoo!)
Same island. So the picture I posted last year still applies.
unfortunately, it appears he’s a bigot.
For the record, I can actually respect his initial rantings against court legislation. There are sound arguments why this is an issue better left to state and federal legislatures. It’s when he leaves that argument (which is quite early in the piece) and starts expressing his beliefs on the issues that he reveals himself.
I’d never read any of Card’s political columns. I remember enjoying his Alvin Maker series of novels, but that was so many years ago. I actually never read his Ender’s Game. (The ending got spoiled for me, so I decided, ‘why bother?’. Same thing happened with the film, The Crying Game. Luckily, I got to see Sixth Sense before I learned how it ended.
Why do so many people follow O Henry’s example? Here, let me tell you now, almost every single novel Victor Hugo ever wrote ended the same way - with death. Yes, Disney fans, Quasi is dead and rotting by the end of the BOOK. So is Esmeralda. No. Sequel. Possible. I’d give anything for an accurate translation of Notre Dame de Paris into a movie. (Written in hard to read color, highlight to read. Don’t highlight if you’re a kid and like Disney movies.). Trust me…I haven’t spoiled a thing. Maybe I’ve made one or two kids cry, and if I have, I apologize for that. That’s why I put the warning there.)
Despite his political and social beliefs, Card can write well. And the comics might end up being good. I remember reading Niven and Pournelle’s Fallen Angel and enjoying it despite its slams against Greens.
Henry Ford knew how to make a car, and Walt Disney knew how to draw a mouse. I might buy the first issue and see what I think
Let me tell you the story
Of a man named Charley
On a tragic and fateful day
He put ten cents in his pocket,
Kissed his wife and family
Went to ride on the MTA
Charley handed in his dime
At the Kendall Square Station
And he changed for Jamaica Plain
When he got there the conductor told him,
“One more nickel.”
Charley couldn’t get off of that train.
Chorus:
Did he ever return,
No he never returned
And his fate is still unlearn’d
He may ride forever
‘neath the streets of Boston
He’s the man who never returned.
If the Kingston Trio is still around, someone should tell them they’re being paged.
Yes, I know it’s a different M.T.A. However, it appears Boston’s MBTAhas a sense of irony. They recently renamed their Fare card the “CharlieCard”.
BBC reports that a line on J.K. Rowling’s official website which used to say, “where I can announce I’ve finished Book Six, and no, that’s not going to happen very soon” now refers to Book Seven.
Leaving people obviously wondering if an announcement is coming soon. Her publishers say the book isn’t finished…but it’s possible she changed the line prior to mailing them the book. If anyone is allowed to steal the publishers’ thunder, it’s herself. And its not as if her announcing it first will affect any sales.
I wait for the day to be able to say I am closely related to a movie star. That’s only a few weeks away, if you’re willing to define ‘movie’ and ’star’ loosely enough. I have confidence in my cousin though to know this is only the beginning.
I have been interviewed by a foreign radio station on a subject of expertise. (On Victor Hugo for his 200th birthday by Australia’s ABC network). I have the audio of that segment, and I hate the sound of my voice. I’m much better read, not heard, but of course, I still subject audiences to my poetry at open mics. I’ve also been interviewed by the Christian Science Monitor (on Hugo).
I google my name often to see what people are saying about me.
However, I have a friend who has beaten me to something I still can only dream about. He found a picture of himself autographed on Ebay! Yes, I know a wrestler. (Not WWE, the federations he’s wrestled in have names such as “Mississippi Valley Wrestling Alliance”, “Interstate Wrestling Association”, “Central States Wrestling Alliance” and “Mid-West Powerhouse Wrestling”. But he has appeared in matches on TV…public access channels, sure, but still…)
Unfortunately, there’s only an hour and 20 minutes left on the auction, and no one’s bid on it yet. Aparently, the seller put the starting bid too high…at $1.99. Ouch. I’m thinking of making a bid, just to help my friend’s ego…but he’d recognize my username.
Most chapbooks of poetry I have sold to people have been autographed, so it’s possible someone could theoretically sell one of those on Ebay someday. I’ve never been asked to sign a photograph of myself though. (That happens rarely for writers. There are only a few authors who’s faces are recognizable, even to fans.)
I wish I could be in DC to participate.
The subject of tattoos came up on Weird Jews Livejournal today and I learned that the original commandment isn’t necessarily interpreted as a blanket ban against all tattoos. Just a ban against tattooing yourself with the image of a pagan God. (Which is understandable).
So as long as I’m not tattooing myself with the image of Baal, I should be fine. (Not all Rabbis would smile, and my mother might not smile, but it’s not directly forbidden…if that mattered to me.)
Considering I hate pain, and the idea of drawing pictures on my skin with a needle isn’t all that tempting, I’m not sure if this is going to change anything for me.
A Texan Orthodox Jewish couple, preparing for a religious wedding, meet with their Rabbi for counseling. The Rabbi asks if they have any last questions before they leave.
The man asks, “Rabbi, we realize it’s tradition for men to dance with men, and women to dance with women at the reception. But, we’d like your permission to dance together.”
“Absolutely not!” says the Rabbi. “It’s immodest. Men and women always dance separately.”
“So after the ceremony I can’t even dance with my own wife?”
“No.” answered the Rabbi. “It’s forbidden.”
“Well, okay.” says the man, “What about sex? Can we finally have sex?”
“Of course!” replies the Rabbi. “Sex is a mitzvah (good thing) within marriage, to have children!”
“What about different positions?” asks the man?
“No problem.” says the Rabbi. “It’s a mitzvah!”
“Woman on top?” the man asks.
“Sure.” says the Rabbi. “Go for it! It’s a mitzvah!”
“Doggy style?”
“Sure! Another mitzvah!”
“On the kitchen table?”
“Yes, yes! A mitzvah!”
“Can we do it on rubber sheets with a bottle of hot oil, a couple of vibrators, a leather harness, a bucket of honey and a porno video?”
“You may indeed. It’s all a mitzvah!”
“Can we do it standing up?”
“NO!” says the Rabbi.
“Why not?” asks the man.
“Could lead to dancing!”
****
Only one small problem with the joke: the commandment against men and women dancing is “in public”. A husband and wife can certainly dance in private. (I’m not sure if there is a religous prohibition against sex in public, but I know there is a civil one.)
Of course, I’m not Orthodox, and none of this applies to me. And the joke, despite being incorrect, is still humorous.
I spent the Summer and Fall of 1990 in Washington DC. The summer as an intern for Congressman, William L Clay. (the current 1st District Congressmanís father).
In January of 1991 I returned to St. Louis, and began attending classes at Washington Universityís University College. I was living at home, and for a variety of reasons, my parents bought a dog. Benny was the third dog I knew. He was already a year old when we got him.
Daisy, half springer-half poodle, was the first, and had already been a member of the family for a couple years when I was born. Daisy left this earth at the age of 13 when I was in sixth grade. She was followed by a pure-bred Springer named Molly. Molly only lived to be nine, and hadnít been gone long when I returned to St. Louis that winter. My parents had thought Molly would be their last dog, but as I said, for a variety of reasons, they changed their minds.
While in some ways, originally, Benny was my dog, I was unable to take Benny with me when I moved out of the house years later. (And Benny wouldnít have come with me willingly. He had become a true Mamaís boy by that point.)
Benny turned 15 this year. The last year has been difficult for him, with steadily progressing arthritis, and almost complete deafness. I had a feeling this would be his last winter, though I was hopeful he would make it to springtime.
My mom called this morning to tell me they had to put him to sleep last night. He contracted a serious disease called ìbloatî which they might have tried surgery if he was younger, but considering all the pain he was in anyway due to his arthritis, it didnít make any sense.
Apparently yesterday morning, without knowing why, my Mom took Benny to Oak Knoll Park where he got to play with some dogfriends one last time.
I had no idea so many famous people had rolexes.
She’s a Rep from the St. Charles/O Fallon area.
The Missouri House website has a list of all the bills she’s sponsored and co-sponsored. She’s only been around since 2002, but there are a few wonderful examples.
2004
Co-Sponsor:
HB885 — Prohibits public institutions or any entity receiving state funds from adopting discrimination policies that exceed state and federal protections against discrimination.
HB911 — Requires the equal treatment of science instruction regarding evolution and intelligent design.
HB1337 — States that English is the official state language.
(It should be noted…none of these three have reached voting)
From NYTimes
State Representative Cynthia Davis of Missouri prefiled two bills for the next session of the Legislature that she said “reflect what people want.” One would remove the state’s requirement that all forms of contraception and their potential health effects be taught in schools, leaving the focus on abstinence. Another would require publishers that sell biology textbooks to Missouri to include at least one chapter with alternative theories to evolution.
But Which Alternative Theories? (link to appropriate Make Louvre (Not War) comic)
For those attending the Sundance Festival, here is the schedule of screenings (PDF).
West Bank Story, starring my cousin in his film debut*, is included in the slot “Shorts Program V”, and is currently scheduled for:
Fri. Jan 21, 8:30am, Prospector
Fri. Jan 21, 7:00pm, Holiday IV
Sat. Jan 22, 3:15pm, Holiday III
Sun. Jan 23, 9:45pm, Broadway 5
Tue. Jan 25, 11:59pm, Holiday III
Thu. Jan 27, 12:00pm, Egyptian
Sat. Jan 29, 9:15am, Eccles
Sat. Jan 29, 10:30pm, Broadway 6
Jan 21 is my birthday, but I’m sure that’s a coincidence. Of course, the festival is in Park City, Utah. Which isn’t exactly convenient to St. Louis. So I am hopeful the short will be included in the batch that appears online.
*He’s had roles in other independent films, but none for which there’s been a chance that I actually might get to see the film. He has also appeared on soap operas, as well as the Lifetime show The Division which stars former Facts of Life cast member Nancy McKeon (Jo).
The money, sad, depressed VMH was referring to in the cartoon below. This was issued, I believe, in the 1950s.
That said…can you imagine the U.S. honoring a poet by putting his or her picture on money? Whitman, maybe? Emily Dickinson, perhaps? I am laughing convulsively at the thought. And I find this sad.
(It should be noted Hugo did serve in the French assembly for awhile, but that’s not why France chose to honor him.)
“I’ve disapeared from the money, they’ve forgotten me in the colleges… it’s worse than exile at Guernsey!”
More Prior Restraint in the US.
On October 27, U.S. Customs sent a letter to Top Shelf Productions notifying them that copies of the anthology Stripburger had been seized, charging that the stories “Richie Bush” by Peter Kuper and “Moj Stub” (translated, “My Pole”) by Bojan Redûić, constituted “clearly piratical copies” of registered and recorded copyrights. The Comic Book Legal Defense Fund has retained counsel to challenge these seizures.
“Richie Bush,” appearing in Stripburger (Vol. 12) #37, is a four-page parody of Richie Rich, that also satirizes the Bush Administration by superimposing the personalities of the Presidentís cabinet on the characters from the comic. “My Pole,” appearing in Stripburger (Vol. 3) # 4-5, which was published in 1994, is an eight-page ecology parable in Serbian that makes visual homage to Snoopy, Charlie Brown, and Woodstock in three panels. Customs seized five copies of the issue with the Peanuts reference and fourteen copies of the issue containing ìRichie Bush.î The stories were both published in the middle of their respective issues and no graphics from either story appeared on the covers.
As Peter David says, “If having a four page satire spoofing trademarked characters was an actionable offense, Mad Magazine would have gone out of business years ago.”
In 1998 Paraguayan Angel Francisco Beard was executed by the state of Virginia in violation of the Vienna Convention. He was executed less than 3 hours after the Supreme Court declared the US didnít have to follow the laws of the World Court. 3 days later, the US asked Rwanda to delay executions. As the writer of the article said, ìAfter all, countries with cruel and irresponsible judicial policies should at least be held accountable to the international community.î
I wrote this poem: Thereís this dude from Paraguay
Thereís this dude from Paraguay
Whoís proíly gonna fry on Tuesday
Unless Virginiaís state Gov
Experiences an outbreak of Love.
The Nation of Paraguayís in a tizzy
And the United Nations is busy
Urging the state to think again
And the White House to poke its nose in
They claim a Convention was broken
The one that in Vienna was spoken.
He wasnít informed of his right
to speak to his consulate.
The US insists theyíre not to blame
the result would have still been the same.
Of course, the news stories dont say
Capital Punishmentís foreign to Paraguay
And to all the European countries
we like to consider our allies
Even Germany, Russia, Japan
Donít execute their fellow man
Alas, Virginiaís state Gov
Experienced no outbreak of Love
And we turned the dude from Paraguay
into an angel that Tuesday.
Six years later the US Supreme Court is willing to reconsider the issue, as we still have many foreigners on death row who werenít informed of their rights.
Men, don’t put your laptop on your lap.
Thanks to Ben, I discovered Google’s new Beta search engine which actually suggests possible searches as you type.
This is similarl to how some internet/email browsers will suggest possible websites/email addresses as you type. However, instead of basing it on your addressbook, or browsing history, neither of which Google knows, it bases it on the world’s web searches. The #1 ranked suggestion being the most popular search.
So, for example, if you type the letter
e the #1 search suggestion is: ebay
no surprise there.
ed the #1 search suggestion is: eddie bauer
(This result may only be seasonal)
edg the #1 search suggestion is: edgar allen poe
This is horrible. That is not how you spell his name. His middle name is Allan. (the correct spelling is the #2 ranked suggestion)
It’s not Google’s fault. They rank their suggestions by popularity.
So how do we fix this:
Go to Google daily. The more times the better. And search for Edgar by spelling his name correctly. That’s with an A.
You don’t have to add any links to your site. No one needs to know you’re doing it. But do it for Edgar.
(Actually, Edgar would probably wish you just forgot about his middle name. He wasn’t too fond of it. But very few people ever search for just “edgar poe”, so that’s a losing battle. We might be able to actually get the correct spelling on top.)
Feel free to post and spread this campaign as far as it can go.
Other Google Suggestion travesties I’ve decided not to fight:
1) Edna Mode seems to be more popular right now than Edna St. Vincent Millay, but I suspect that is only temporary, since she is a character in the movie, The Incredibles. I am hopeful given time this travesty will correct itself.
2) E.E. yields very unhappy results. I can accept that e.e.o.c. is the most popular search. A seller of engagement rings is ranked #2. “e.e. commings” is #7. Gagggh! “cummings” doesn’t even make the top 10. If you continue typing, “e.e. c” you get commings, comings, and cunnings as your top three. It appears no one EVER searches for e.e. cummings by spelling his name correctly. (or not enough to matter). I suspect the barriers to getting this corrected are too high to overcome.
I recently posted why I wouldn’t want to move to Canada, France, or Britain. Their restrictions against free speech are troubling.
However, it seems, we’ve got Trouble right here, with a Capital T which rhymes with G which stands for Government (the U.S. Govt).
In an apparent reversal of decades of U.S. practice, recent federal Office of Foreign Assets Control regulations bar American companies from publishing works by dissident writers in countries under sanction unless they first obtain U.S. government approval.
The restriction, condemned by critics as a violation of the First Amendment, means that books and other works banned by some totalitarian regimes cannot be published freely in the United States.
That’s right. A dissident writer in a totalitarian regime under sanction who is risking his or her life through their writing, can’t be published in the US unless the publishing company first gets government approval.
In a further wrinkle, even if publishers obtain a license for a book ó something they are loathe to do ó they believe the regulations bar them from advertising it, forcing readers to find the dissident works on their own.
The government tries to justify it by saying licenses can be gotten…but this is Prior Restraint, and very unAmerican.
prior restraint
n. an attempt to prevent publication or broadcast of any statement, which is an unconstitutional restraint on free speech and free press (even in the guise of an anti-nuisance ordinance).
I am now set up to receive and send podcasts.
It’s relatively easy.
Brief summary since previous post may have been confused.
1) If you are a current reader of my blog, at the current time all mp3s I might “podcast” will appear on this blog, so really, you don’t have to do anything to see the posts. They will appear like the one below did. And you can click and download them.
2) If you have a news aggregator, and know what news aggregators look like, the podcasting aggregator looks very similar. And if you were interested in subbing to several radio shows, and wanted to get any media files I happened to put on my blog in the same aggregator, well then you should head on over to Ipodder, find the software package for your operating system, download it, and when you’re adding URLs, add: http://gavroche.org/blog/index.xml
3) if you wanted to create your own podcast, you should also head on over to ipodder (link above) and read the instructions they provide. If you happen to have Moveable Type as your blogging software, the Plug In I linked to a couple entries ago will be extremely helpful.
The term podcasting plays upon the terms broadcasting and webcasting and is derived from the name of the iPod portable music player, the playback device of choice of many early podcast listeners. While not directly associated with Apple’s iPod device or iTunes jukebox software, the company did contribute both the desire and the technology for this capability. Podcasting is similar to time-shifted video software and devices like TiVo, which let you watch what you want when you want by recording and storing video, except that podcasting is used for audio and is currently free of charge. Note, however, that this technology can be used to pull any kind of file, including software updates, pictures, and videos.
In short, podcasting involves the recording of internet radio or similar internet audio programs. These recordings are then made available for download to your iPod or other portable digital audio device. You can listen to the podcast internet radio program while you are away from your computer or at a different time than the original program was broadcast.
Legal podcasts are generally talk-oriented. You can think of it as an audio-blog if you wish. However, You can receive several **real** radio shows as podcasts. Such as several shows from Air America.
Here’s info on receiving and creating podcasts.
Naturally…if you add Podcast ability to your RSS feed, and then upload an MP3 of the latest Eminem track, you’re likely to piss off Eminem’s lawyers. The law hasn’t changed any. Which is why most Podcasts are talk.
I have modified the RSS file on this blog. Unfortunately, podcast software only takes RSS 2.0 at the moment, so I modified the RSS 2.0 xml http://gavroche.org/blog/index.xml
However, since the only reason one would use the 2.0 xml is for the podcast software, there is no reason any new syndications have to be created at livejournal. The http://gavroche.org/blog/atom.xml will still work perfectly for News Aggregators.
Basically, as I understand it, when you run Ipodder or IpodderX or whatever Podcast software you have, and plug in the index.xml url above, any entry of mine with media in it, you will be able to download the media. This applies to images, music, or video. Of course, you can already do that with my blog, and any normal news aggregator. But Podcasts don’t have to be associated with blogs. And people will listen to them that would never read a blog.
I haven’t downloaded the software yet, so I’m not positive this will work. I am going to do that a little later tonight.
Don’t worry. I have no plans of making erotic videos starring myself and distributing them across the internet. (But I could!) What will appear on the audioblog/podcast? I’m not positive, but maybe me reading my poetry. I have a few other related ideas.
Why? Why not?
Here’s the Moveable Type plugin necessary for ‘audio-blog’ support.
Bert the Turkey was destined to wind up as Christmas Dinner.
A church was having a raffle, and he was one of the prizes.
A couple in Bristol were notified they had won Bert, and that Bert would soon be slaughtered and delivered to them.
They told the church they’d prefer to have Bert delivered to them alive.
(Seems they’re vegetarians)
The 15 lb. turkey “is now living at his new home with some rescued battery hens for company until a mate can be found for him. “
In the News
We may have a Dickless New Years Eve. (There’s only been 1 Dickless NYE in my lifetime, and since I was only 1 at the time, I don’t remember it.) Dick had a stroke. Doctors say he’s fine, and recovering, but he may miss his 33-year old gig.
A reason to move to Canada . (If I were gay)
Ice in Antarctica is getting thinner (And the population of an important food source for penguins and seals is declining…possibly related to the increase in temperature).
Do you have a weight problem? It might be because you’re not getting enough sleep.
Italian Shoemakers selling shoes individually. Now you don’t have to buy two pairs of shoes to be able to wear different shoes on each foot.
Russian cat makes 1300 mile trek across Siberia to find its way home.
While no St. Louis station carries Air America, episodes of many shows can be Downloaded. (Including the last 170 episodes of Al Franken’s show)
I’ve added a ‘random quote’ from my poetry or prose in the upper-right hand corner of this blog. Currently, there are 5 quotes. You can refresh to see another. These quotes in their original context can be found here.
So there I am in a bar with a couple friends.
To be specific…Frederick’s Music Lounge.
A guy (I’ll call him Wayne even though that isn’t his name) walks over to our table so we can settle a couple of bets between him and his S.O.
1) Has Marina Sirtis (ST:TNG Deanna Troi) had ‘enhancement surgery’.
Our answer is basically we don’t know, but if so, it was prior to her appearance in Wicked Lady with Faye Dunaway. They were just as large back then.
2) Has Gates McFadden (ST:TNG Beverly Crusher) had a face lift?
Our answer is it’s likely. She has at least aged a lot less quickly than the others.
If you’re wondering why these two questions — Wednesday night is the night Freddy’s shows episodes of ST:TNG during their 5-9pm happy-hour. And ‘Wayne’ had seen us there before. So he figured we might be able to help.
Later his SO comes over to the table (I’ll call her Wanda, even though that isn’t her name) and the five of us start chatting about a variety of things. Wayne suggests we should show up at Freddy’s for their Thursday Night open mic (aka Hootenanny). 2 out of the 3 of us tell him we have. I tell him I’d be there more often if it weren’t just a music open mic, but I perform poetry.
‘Wayne’ says, “they allow poetry.”
I tell him, “when I was here I was told no poetry, maybe the rules have changed.” (doubtful voice)
‘Wayne’ says “I know they allow poetry. I’ve heard poetry. Let’s ask Freddy.”
Freddy walks by the table, heading towards the stage to do something to get ready for the band that will play later and ‘Wayne’ asks him, “Is poetry allowed at the open mic?”
Freddy doesn’t look too happy. He says it sometimes happens spontaneously, but generally no.
One of my two friends said, “I can understand. This is Frederick’s Music Lounge.”
He smiles, and expresses happiness we do understand.
I should have bet ‘Wayne’. I knew he made bets. Maybe I could have bet him a beer. I like Freddy, by the way. He has a great bar. And he is a great musician himself. He has his own show on KDHX. I saw him perform for the first time over 10 years ago at the Wabash Triangle Cafe. There are several open mics in the area that allow poetry. I have absolutely no problem with music-only ones. Except, I can’t sing. I can’t play any musical instruments. (Alright. I can do both. Terribly. So no one wants to be within the same room when I do.) So when I go to the Hootenanny, it’s only to watch and listen. So I go less often. But the Thursday Night Hootenanny at Fredericks is probably the best music open mic in town.
Maybe 10-15-20 minutes later ‘Wanda’ asks me. “Did you perform at the Wabash Triangle Cafe?” (I haven’t mentioned knowing Freddy from there. All I have mentioned is I perform poetry. I do look like I’ve been around awhile. So I can’t say it’s completely out of the blue.)
I smile. “Yes.”
“I knew you looked familiar,” she says.
“Do you remember my poem, “Sick Puppy? (By clicking on link you agree you are 18 years of age or older, and you waive all legal claims against me if you are offended by the poem.)
She says she remembers it. (No one ever forgets. I’ll be 80 years old, and someone will stop me on the street and say, “Sick Puppy?!”) She asks about the taxi-cab driver poet. Rob Templeton, the host of the Wabash Triangle Cafe open mic while I was there, unfortunately passed away a couple years ago. He didn’t make it to the 10-year reunion we had back in March.
Next time I go to the Hootenanny, maybe ‘Wanda’ and ‘Wayne’ will be there. Maybe I’ll get up and try to sing one of my poems. That probably wouldn’t make Freddy happy. I don’t think anyone in the bar would be happy to hear that.
Matt provided a link to this article on Free Speech which addresses, One reason I wouldn’t want to move to Canada, Britain, or France.
There are laws against offensive/hate speech in all three. The speech itself is a crime.
Britain is considering expanding their law to make inciting Religious hate a crime, in addition to the inciting racial hatred, which is already a crime.
British Comedian Rowan Atkinson argued before the British Govt:
“To criticise a person for their race is a manifestly irrational and ridiculous. But to criticise their religion - that is a right. That is a freedom. And a law that attempts to say you can criticise or ridicule ideas, as long as they are not religious ideas, is a very peculiar law indeed.”
“It all points to the promotion of the idea there should be a right not to be offended… In my view, the right to offend is far more important than any right not to be offended.”
The beginning of his argument feels weak to me. I see no difference between racial hate speech and religious hate speech. What’s more, according to the article, Britain already includes hatred of Jews and Sikhs in their law, so I am really confused how they could justify it’s not alright to speak unkind things of Jews or Sikhs, but it is alright to speak unkind things of Christians.
As Atkinson also said, banning speech adds “a veneer of tolerance concealing a snakepit of unaired and unchallenged views”. Unless the hate is spoken, there is no way to know it exists, and no way to address it. Sure, the group of people who were hearing the hate previously now don’t, and this makes them feel more comfortable, as if the hate has disappeared. But it hasn’t.
Note: for those wondering how Britain defines inciting hatred. The original 1996 Act where Racial Hatred was defined. Basically, what needs to be proven is there was ‘intent’ to stir up hatred, or the actions were ‘likely to’ stir up hatred. It doesn’t go into detail on what standards are used to prove this.
Just as an example…Gibson’s Passion was shown in Britain. While Gibson denied any mal-intent, it would have been possible (I think) to argue that like the ancient Passion Plays, the movie was likely to stir up hatred. I’m curious if anyone attempted to accuse Gibson or UK film distributors (since Gibson might not be answerable to UK law) of inciting hatred.
Here are a few actual cases:
Brigitte Bardot was fined for writing a book which said races shouldn’t mix.
A farmer who “allegedly said supporters of the traditional country way of life should be given the same rights as blacks, Muslims and gays.” was arrested.
A French author who called Islam “The stupidest religion” was arrested, but finally cleared.
From: Chanukah basics (aish.com)
From the 12/6/2004 Press Briefing: (Very last question)
Q Scott, on the Middle East, many evangelical Christians are supporting right-wing Jews in Israel who want to rebuild the temple on Temple Mount in Jerusalem. They believe this is a prerequisite for Christ’s return to Earth. They believe when Christ returns to Earth — they call this “the Rapture” — he will take back with Him the true believers, and the rest, the non–believers, Jews and Muslims, will be left behind to face a violent death here on Earth. My question is, as a born-again Christian, does the President support efforts to rebuild a temple on the Temple Mount?
MR. McCLELLAN: Russ, we can sit here and talk about religious issues, but I’m not — I will be glad to take your question and if there’s more, I will get back to you on it.
Q Is he a born-again Christian?
MR. McCLELLAN: Thank you.
For my opinion, I will take the two questions above in order.
1) The actual question involves foreign policy, it’s not as McClellan tries to claim a purely religious issue. How the President’s declared religion affects his foreign or domestic policy is fair game. I would expect a Jewish president to be asked for his opinions on our Middle East foreign policy. (I’d actually expect it to be asked in the Presidential campagin. I don’t believe this question has been so directly phrased to Bush up until now, and he’s been President for four years.)
The lead-up to the question was phrased with the appropriate words. That is, “many evangelical Christians.” The member of the press corps (Russ somebody) made it clear he didn’t assume all Evangelists thought this way.
Just as it is fair game to ask a Catholic politician their stand on Abortion, the Death Penalty and War, this question is also fair. (Some might say it’s important to ask the question since not as many people are aware of this evangelical stance, so they wouldn’t even know to ask the question, which is one reason why it’s disappointing it’s being asked 4 years into Bush’s Presidency.)
2) This falls into the line of a rhetorical question, and borders on negating my praise above on not making any assumptions.
heard on Livejournal’s WeirdJews [Note: ‘milchig’ and ‘fleishig’ mean ‘dairy’ and ‘meat’ respectively. ‘Pareve’ means neither meat nor dairy, so it can be eaten with either.]
Once when I was a kid making latkes with my dad, I asked him if latkes were milchig or fleishig.“Well,” he said without looking up from the grater, “if you’re using a food processor, you can make them pareve. But real authentic latkes are always fleishig.”
“Why?” I asked.
“Because you always get a bit of your knuckle in with the potatoes.”
The above is a picture of my cousin. He’s the one on the right. It’s from a scene in West Bank Story. A short film.
WEST BANK STORY is a musical comedy about Israelis and Palestinians that takes place between rival fast-food restaurant owners in the West Bank.
Ahmed and his Palestinian brothers own the Hummus Hut; Ariel and his Israeli Settler friends own the Kosher King. Both are at odds over who has the right to sell falafels there with seemingly no solution in sight. The stakes are raised when Ariel’s brother, David, a soldier at a checkpoint, falls in love with Ahmed’s sister Fatima, Hummus Hut’s cashier. Tensions mount as the Israelis build a wall between the two eating establishments and the Palestinians plan an intifadah. The couple profess their love for each other and attempt to bring the two sides together but both restaurants are accidentally burned to the ground. In the aftermath, the mutual need to supply everyone with ‘affordable, great tasting falafels’ brings both sides together, planting a seed of hope for peace in the Middle East.
My cousin, Ben, is the star. He has the role of David. That’s the Tony/Romeo role depending upon whether you assume this is a take-off of West Side Story or Romeo and Juliet.
It will be one of the 82 Short Films (out of 3887 submitted) at the Sundance Film Festival in January. Starting January 20th, for five months following the festival, I believe anyone will be able to see it for free (along with other festival shorts) on the Online Film Festival at Sundance.org. [According to Sundance, “many of the short films will be available”. So this isn’t definite yet.]
A little out of season, I know. However, the issue came up today at work (don’t ask me how), and I learned that there weren’t just 10 plagues in Egypt, but 50. The Seder Haggadah my family reads from on Passover is shortened a bit, so it doesn’t have the following passage:
Rabbi Yosi the Gallilean said: How do you know that the Egyptians were stricken by ten plagues in Egypt, and then were struck by fifty plagues at the sea?
In Egypt it says of them, “The magicians said to Pharaoh `This is the finger of G-d.’ At the sea it says, “Israel saw the great hand that the L-rd laid against Egypt; and the people feared the L-rd, and they believed in the L-rd and in His servant Moses.”
Now, how often were they smitten by `the finger’? Ten plagues!
Thus you must conclude that in Egypt they were smitten by ten plagues, at the sea they were smitten by fifty plagues!
The Ten Plagues were:
I can’t find a list of the other 40, so I thought perhaps, with a little assistance, I might be able to come up with another 40. (Some suggest as many as 200 or 250 plagues, so if we can come up with more, all the better.)
Now, it should be noted, G-d plans ahead. At twilight on the sixth day, according to tradtion, right before resting, G-d had ten final creations. One of these, for example, was declaring there would be an ownerless ram for Abraham to sacrifice instead of Isaac a few year’s down the road.
So, I am hopeful we can agree disco, spam (email), and Barney the dinosaur all were among the 50 plagues.
We need 37 more. Any suggestions?
The first night of Channukah is Tuesday night. Time to get out the dreidels. here’s a picture of a dreidel (sometimes spelled draydel):
If you wished to, you could make a dreidel out of cardboard. Here’s a pattern, you could print out and use as a guide:
There’s only one problem with the game of dreidel — mathematically it is unfair. The traditional rules favor the player who goes first. And the odds successively get worse, so the 2nd player has greater odds than the 3rd, etc.
Now for the fun part of this entry. Today on the Weird Jews Livejournal community there has been some discussion on a different variant. A variant that would instantly come to mind of any young adult.
Here are 2 sets of the variant rules:
נ* - Nun - Nothing happens
ג - Gimmel - All other players must take off an article of clothing
ה - Hey - One player of your choosing must take off an article of clothing
ש/פ - Shin/Pey - You take off an article of clothing
or
נ - Nun - Nothing happens
ג - Gimmel - All players remove an article of clothing
ה - Hey - One player of your choosing must take off an article of clothing
ש/פ - Shin/Pey - You take off an article of clothing
It should be noted that noone has mentioned about the ‘odds’ in either variation…so if one were to play this version of the game…it might be recommended that you make sure you spin early.
It should also be noted one could easily replace “take off an article of clothing” with “take a drink” and you have a great drinking game.
{Note: Dfferent dreidels have different letters for the fourth letter. The letters are a Hebrew acronym for the phrase “A Great Miracle Happened Here/There”. Depending upon whether the dreidel is an Israeli dreidel or not an Israeli dreidel decides whether it is “here” or “there”.]
*If you see question marks here instead of Hebrew letters, you need to enable unicode on your browser.
Christy is putting out her Christmas tchotckes. I instantly knew what she meant, smiled at the linguistic irony, and then looked it up and realized there was a second definition which I know Christy hadn’t intended, but….I think I might be interested in that type of Christmas Tchotcke. [Note: the linguistic etymology makes the use ironic, but not inappropriate, since as is well known, “English doesn’t borrow from other languages - English follows other languages down dark alleys, knocks them over and goes through their pockets for loose grammar.”]
Unfortunately, on Christmas, for the umpteenth year in a row, I will be in the Caribbean. With parents and siblings. Putting a slight crimp in any plans I might have for my own special Christmas Tchotchke.
More details of this intra-species battle
I’m thinking about switching to the CBBC as my primary news source. If anything truly important happens, they’ll let me know.
Canadians get to download songs from ITunes for less. (99 Canadian cents, which is about equal to 83 American cents. Europeans pay the most. But this is all due to the rate of exchange, which can go up and down.)
My favorite paragraph in the article:
Americans looking for a bargain will have to do more than just profess their love of hockey or their distaste for President Bush. Because the Canadian store requires a local billing address, Americans will have to get a home in Saskatoon or Thunder Bay to get in on the lower pricing.
Here’s a quiz worthy of nobody. (It’s cheating to go to tvguide.com, tvland.com or any newspaper that might be reporting on this list)
Describe the television moments below (name the Television Show, or describe the news event if it is a news event)
(I don’t know those with an asterisk. All phrasings come from the Press Release linked to previously.)
99 Brenda & Dylan Do It (5/2/91)
96 Sam Gets Fired (1/21/04) *
95 Clarabell Speaks (9/24/60)
92 Laettner’s Buzzer Beater (3/28/92) *
90 That’s My Boy? (9/25/63) *
88 The Saving Heart (11/16/83) *
84 The Day After (11/20/83)
82 Florida’s Husband Dies (9/29/76)
77 Schweddy Balls (12/12/98)
50 Brody Kisses Berry (3/23/03) *
48 Sam & Diane’s First Kiss (3/31/83)
41 Bette’s Farewell to Johnny (5/21/92)
35 Luke & Laura’s Wedding (11/17/81)
26 Edith Talks Back (01/08/72)
20 The Contest (11/18/92)
10 Who Shot J.R.? (3/21/80)
7 The Whipping of Kunte Kinte (1/24/77)
TV Guide and TVLand’s Top 100 TV Moments.
Here are the Top 10
10 Who Shot J.R.? (3/21/80)
9 Lucy at the Candy Factory (9/15/52)
8 The M*A*S*H Finale (2/28/83)
7 The Whipping of Kunte Kinte (1/24/77)
6 John-John’s Salute (11/25/63)
5 The Beatles Debut in America (2/9/64)
4 I Have a Dream (8/28/63)
3 The Challenger Disaster (1/28/86)
2 One Small Step for Man (7/20/69)
1 9/11/01
6,4,3,2 & 1 were NOT TV moments. They were historical moments that were filmed by television news cameras.
And #4 was a speech alone. I am unaware of anything visual connected with it. It would have been just as powerful if heard on the radio.
Update
As Christy points out, they further clarify the list as how TV impacted the world, and the world impacted TV.
Everything fits, but I don’t feel it’s fair to rank the two sets of moments together.
I’d be interested in a separate list of top telvision moments, and top historical moments as seen through television. It’s not fair to compare the MASH finale to 9/11 or the Challenger.
I’d definitely agree with the top 3 historical events on television. I might rank One Small Step #1 though just because I prefer the emotion of joy and hope to the emotion of horror and fear.
From a Trekker’s perspective, I agree with their two Star Trek choices. Kirk kissing Uhura and Picard going Borg. The first for its social ramifications, and the second for its sheer violation of “you know everything is going to be alright at the end of the show”. There just isn’t anything comparable from DS9, Voyager or Enterprise.
**NEWSFlash**
Intel Co-Founder Robert Noyce* and current CEO Craig Barrett in a news conference earlier today personally asked President Bush to ignore the Senate. “Intel’s Board of Directors and Executive Management are quite capable of running the company on our own, and if we see any need of reform, we do not need the government’s assistance. Thank You.”
* Fellow Grinnell College alum. (Note: The fact he died in 1990 reveals a serio
