Archive for 6/4/2008 - 1 Sivan, 5768

A handful of readers will have an inkling what inspired me to create this post.  But the inspiration is irrelevant.  This may or may not prove useful to most readers, but it could be highly educational.  This is basically an annotated list of Jewish religious texts.  I am sure an Orthodox reader or two of this blog would be upset that X or Y is missing.  I am also sure a Reform reader or two of this blog will look at several items on the list, squint, and say, ‘hunh?”  Not all of these books are on my library shelf (physical or digital).

TANAKH - The Hebrew Bible (an acronym) - 24 books

• Torah - The first five books: Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, Deuteronomy, Numbers
• Neviim - Prophets: Joshua, Judges, Samuel, Kings, Isaiah, Jeremiah, Ezekiel, The Twelve Prophets (Hosea, Joel, Amos, Jonah, Obadiah, Micah, Nahum, Habakkuk, Zephaniah, Haggai, Zechariah, Malachi)
• Ketuvim - Writings: Psalms, Proverbs, Job, Song of Songs, Ruth, Lamentations, Ecclesiastes, Esther, Daniel, Ezra and Nehemiah

Notes: Those familiar with the Catholic Old Testament might notice a few missing.  These are the ‘Deuterocanonical‘ books, referred to in the King James Version as ‘Apocrypha.’  Their absence doesn’t mean they’re treated as heresy, just that they’re not canon.  Though some of the doctrine in these books are rejected.
Mishnah - Written record of Rabbinical discussions and decisions that occurred over centuries and finally written down around 200 CE.

Talmud (or Gemarah) - Written record of Rabbinical discussions on the Mishnah.  There are actually two Talmuds.  If not specified, it’s the Babylonian Talmud (550 CE).  The less commonly referenced is the Palestinian or Jerusalem Talmud (350 CE).  The only difference is the community of Rabbis involved in the discussion.
Codes of Law - further attempts to organize the Rabbinical decisions in the Talmud(s)

• Mishneh Torah: Compiled by Moses ben Maimon (aka Maimonides - 1135-1204 CE)
• Shulkhan Aruch: Compiled by Yosef Karo (1488-1575)

Other books by Maimonides

• Sefir Hamitzvot (Book of the Commandments): an annotated listing of all 613 commandments from the Torah
• Guide for the Perplexed: a philosophical work comparing and contrasting Jewish theology with Aristotelian philosophy.

Zohar: Mystical commentary on the Torah.  The basis for Kaballah.  The Zohar was discovered by Moses de Leon in 13th Century Spain.  It was written in the 2nd century by Rabbi Simeon ben Yohai.  Some people dispute Moses de Leon’s claim of origin.  Of course, some people dispute that the Torah was handed down on Mt. Sinai.  Heretics!

Midrash: further commentary on the TANAKH.  I’ve written Midrash, myself.  Of course, few have read mine.  There are several classic examples, but I’m not going to bother naming them, except those in the next category.
Aggadah - Legends: Non legal texts from the Mishnah, Talmud, and Midrash.

• Sefer Ha-aggadah - Book of Legends: compiled by Hayim Nahman Bialik and Yehoshua Hana Ravnitzky. Published in Hebrew in Odessa, Russia in 1908-11.  English translation by William Braude in 1992.  Bialik is also often considered the Father of Modern Hebrew Poetry.
• Legends of the Jews - compiled by Louis Ginzberg (in German) - English translation by Henrietta Szold published in New York City in 1909.

If anyone thinks I’ve made a mistake, let me know.  However, the above was not written off the top of my head…I was familiar with most of it, but I used various websites I trust to make sure I got the descriptions and dates correct.

The colleague I normally share my office with is gone for a few days, so I can play my choice of music.  So I decided to bring in showtunes.  Today, I brought in Les Miserables CSR. 

(For non Les Miz-geeks, that’s shorthand for the Complete Symphonic Recording, which contains on 3 cds every note and every word of the original musical…which bears that adjective because they did some editing after the 10th anniversary.  I don’t believe there’s a CSR for the post-10th Anniversary musical, but I wouldn’t want it.  OK, maybe I would for completion.  I do have the Original Broadway Cast, Original London Cast, Tenth Anniversary Concert, and Original French Concept…clever people can figure out the genearlly accepted acronyms for all of those. No, I don’t understand the French, but I have the CD, and I have listened to it.  I don’t yet have the Japanese Cast, even though it is available from Amazon.  It is rumored there once was a Hebrew cast recording, but it’s not available anywhere, or I would have it.)

I was just listening to Lovely Ladies and realizing that I am glad no one can hear the music from outside the office.  It’s not very work appropriate.  (This is one of the songs they did edit after the 10th anniversary, and they made it somewhat more appropriate, but I feel it’s rather silly since they may have softened the language somewhat, but the meaning remains the same.)

[The docks. Sailors, whores and their customers, pimps, etc. Fantine wanders in]

[SAILOR ONE]
I smell women
Smell ‘em in the air
Think I’ll drop my anchor
In that harbor over there

[SAILOR TWO]
Lovely Ladies
Smell ‘em through the smoke
Seven days at sea
Can make you hungry for a poke

[SAILOR THREE]
Even stokers need a little stoke!

[WOMEN]
Lovely Ladies
Waiting for a bite
Waiting for the customers
Who only come at night
Lovely Ladies
Ready for the call
Standing up or lying down
Or any way at all
Bargain prices up against the wall

[OLD WOMAN]
Come here, my dear
Let’s see this trinket you wear
This bagatelle…

[FANTINE]
Madame, I’ll sell it to you…

[OLD WOMAN]
I’ll give you four

[FANTINE]
That wouldn’t pay for the chain!

[OLD WOMAN]
I’ll give you five. You’re far to eager to sell.
It’s up to you.

[FANTINE]
It’s all I have

[OLD WOMAN]
That’s not my fault

[FANTINE]

[OLD WOMAN]
No more than five
My dear, we all must stay alive!

[WOMEN]
Lovely ladies
Waiting in the dark
Ready for a thick one
Or a quick one in the park
Whore 1
Long time short time
Any time, my dear
Cost a little extra if you want to take all year!

[ALL]
Quick and cheap is underneath the pier!

[CRONE]
What pretty hair!
What pretty locks you got there
What luck you got. It’s worth a centime, my dear
I’ll take the lot

[FANTINE]
Don’t touch me! Leave me alone!

[CRONE]
Let’s make a price.
I’ll give you all of ten francs,
Just think of that!

[FANTINE]
It pays a debt

[CRONE]
Just think of that

[FANTINE]
What can I do? It pays a debt.
Ten francs may save my poor Cosette!

[SAILOR THREE]
Lovely lady!
Fastest on the street
Wasn’t there three minutes
She was back up on her feet

[SAILOR ONE]
Lovely lady!
What yer waiting for?
Doesn’t take a lot of savvy
Just to be a whore
Come on, lady
What’s a lady for?

[Fantine re-emerges, her long hair cut short]

[PIMP]
Give me the dirt, who’s that bit over there?

[WHORE ONE]
A bit of skirt. She’s the one sold her hair.

[WHORE TWO]
She’s got a kid. Sends her all that she can

[PIMP]
I might have known
There is always some man
Lovely lady, come along and join us!
Lovely lady!

[WHORE ONE]
Come on dearie, why all the fuss?
You’re no grander than the rest of us
Life has dropped you at the bottom of the heap
Join your sisters

[WHORE TWO]
Make money in your sleep!

[Fantine goes off with one of the sailors]

[WHORE ONE]
That’s right dearie, let him have the lot

[WHORE THREE]
That’s right dearie, show him what you’ve got!

[WOMEN]
Old men, young men, take ‘em as they come
Harbor rats and alley cats and every kind of scum
Poor men, rich men, leaders of the land
See them with their trousers off they’re never quite as grand
All it takes is money in your hand!

Lovely ladies
Going for a song
Got a lot of callers
But they never stay for long

[FANTINE]
Come on, Captain,
you can wear your shoes
Don’t it make a change
To have a girl who can’t refuse
Easy money
Lying on a bed
Just as well they never see
The hate that’s in your head
Don’t they know they’re making love
To one already dead!

The agency I work for is hosting a conference this weekend for delegates from its sister agencies across the world.  I’ve been helping out, greeting people as they arrive, doing odd jobs, and attending a handful of sessions myself.

One event I made sure I made was this morning’s All Faith Prayer gathering.  Call it a morbid curiousity to see how horribly we failed at the concept.  I rarely hear of a successful one.  Actually, I think we did extremely well.

The leading clergymember (an employee at our agency) led off with a song I’d never heard before, but which I found quite energizing.  With the aid of Google, I’ve discovered it’s based on  Psalm 118:24, which of course is from acceptable scripture for any Abrahamic religion.  And the context is generic enough to be appreciated by anyone.
He then asked for members of the audience to stand up and announce things happening in their community which make them feel blessed.  A nice tradition to make the service interactive.

Then someone sang Amazing Grace, but it was a performance, and not treated as a sing along.  It’s a beautiful song, and I have always felt so.  The context is certainly outside of my faith, but it doesn’t alter its beauty.   There is nothing offensive to me about witnessing the prayer of someone else as long as one isn’t coerced to join along.

The leader of the service also read from Matthew, but it was a passage referencing the end of times, and judgment, which is something all Abrahamic faiths at least share in common.  He never once named the Lord.
He wrapped up with a sermon that could have come from any faith based on the activities of our agency, the good we do for the world, and how the world would be a better place if everyone gave a little bit of themselves back to the community.

As I wrote back in May

Alan Moore has recently published a graphic novel exploring Wendy, Dorothy and Alice’s sexuality.  I wondered how the Ormond Street Hospital for Children, which owns the rights to Peter Pan through 2007, would respond.

Now we know. 

The hospital, which was bequeathed the rights to the “Peter Pan” books by Barrie, said: “In order to be published or distributed in these territories, Alan Moore’s title would need our permission or license. From press coverage, we understand it deals with sensitive subject matter which does not initially seem appropriate to be associated with the hospital and with J.M. Barrie’s legacy to us.”

Stephen Cox, the hospital’s spokesman, said in a telephone interview Friday that it has not taken legal action against Moore and is was waiting to see whether the author will contact the institution to discuss its objections.

Moore’s alleged response is fascinating:

In a recent interview with the BBC, Moore said “The Lost Girls” was inspired by “Peter Pan,” but that he doesn’t intend to seek permission from the hospital to use the Wendy character.

“I don’t really see that you can ban anything in this day and age. It wasn’t our intention to try to provoke a ban,” Moore was quoted as saying.

It seems to me that Moore is giving carte blanche for anyone to use his characters in their own work.  Cool.

Not only does the Hartford Coffee Company have honest staff — my laptop was waiting for me upon my arrival there this morning — they make an awesome Bagel/Cream Cheese/Lox sandwich.  I’m told their fritattas are also excellent.  And their breakfast items are served throughout the day.  During non-breakfast hours, I highly recommend their Felafel as well.

I don’t drink coffee so I haven’t sampled their wide variety.

Was at open mic tonight.  brought my laptop with me.  left it there.  G-d will receive some prayers tonight that whoever found it — whether fellow customer or staff cleaning up — is honest, and I will be able to retrieve it tomorrow morning.  Sure, it’s kind of unusual to be asking G-d to have an effect on the past.  I realize this.  The laptop is a valuable piece of machinery, but more than that, I care about what’s on it.  Sure, it should all be backed up.  I know that.  But it’s not.

Here are a few videos for you to watch:

Mickey!

Jenny!

Jessie’s Girl!

Stray Cat Strut!

Let’s get physical!

We don’t need no education!

Let’s dance!

I want my MTV!

and the truest quote from all the videos:

“I’m not like other guys. I’m different.” - Michael Jackson

My choices may say too much about me.

Pick your own

A month ago, Awholecanofplot was Shopping on Manchester, and learned The Book House was moving.  They’re still moving.  The guy behind the counter today said the date wasn’t set, but it would be late summer early fall.  They’re staying on Manchester, but they will be further East, near Big Bend.

Currently, for those who seek bargains, everything is 20-70% off.

As I mentioned in April I never leave empty handed.  Today I left with two books by Elie Wiesel (”Messengers of God” and “One Generation After”), one book by Chaim Potok (My Name is Asher Lev) and an Agatha Christie novel which will be a gift for a friend.

This Land Is Your Land (manuscript version)

The original 1940 lyrics are slightly different from the song we are all familiar with:

This land is your land, this land is my land
From California to the New York Island,
From the Redwood Forest, to the Gulf stream waters,
God blessed America for me.As I went walking that ribbon of highway
And saw above me that endless skyway,
And saw below me the golden valley, I said:
God blessed America for me.

I roamed and rambled and followed my footsteps
To the sparkling sands of her diamond deserts,
And all around me , a voice was sounding:
God blessed America for me.

Was a high wall there that tried to stop me
A sign was painted said: Private Property,
But on the back side it didn’t say nothing –
God blessed America for me.

When the sun come shining, then I was strolling
In wheat fields waving and dust clouds rolling;
The voice was chanting as the fog was lifting:
God blessed America for me.

One bright sunny morning in the shadow of the steeple
By the Relief Office I saw my people –
As they stood hungry, I stood there wondering if
God blessed America for me.

It is said that Guthrie was sick and tired of hearing Irving Berlin’s song, God Bless America, on the radio and recorded this as a response.

I just checked, and my gmail account turned 2 yesterday.

Clocking it from my first email, from the “Gmail Team” explaining how everything worked at 11:19:18 am June 15, 2004, to the last email received prior to 11:19:18 am on June 15, 2006, I saved 36,090 emails.

The only thing I delete is spam, so I am averaging about 18,000 non-spam emails a year.

Now…I could go through my backlogs and delete 90 emails.  I’m sure I could find 90 emails I don’t really need.  I could probably find 36,000 I don’t need.  But why delete?  Currently, I’m only using 20% of my space.

And more importantly

36,090/18 = 2005.  Exactly.  

Now, isn’t that weird? 

Today, in the mail, I received a copy of The Writer.

It was addressed to me. I didn’t order it. It’s not my birthday. I’ve received no indication from anyone that I should be expecting this.

We’ll see if I get another issue next month so I can figure out if this is a one-issue sample, or a full subscription.  If the former, it’s possible it’s promotional.  I used to subscribe to Writer’s Digest and I am probably on a list somewhere.
If this is a random gift, the only way to respond is to give a gift randomly myself.
I have desired in the past that Amazon would allow anonymous gifting through their wish lists, but I don’t think that’s possible.

Zork: Left Behind (The religious text-adventure game.) (hilarious)

A powerful Non Sequitur (it’s a rerun from 2002 but still as good.)

Friend, AWholeCanofPlot is getting involved with Adult Literacy. It’s through a local YMCA program. I might consider it too.

The Senate is apparently only one vote shy of passing a Flag Desecration Amendment. The House has already passed it, and all 50 states have passed non-binding resolutions in support.

des·e·crate dÄ•s‘Ä­-krāt
To violate the sacredness of; profane.

Why do so many people in this nation feel the need to declare the flag a sacred object? It makes no sense for those who aren’t religious. And for the majority of those who are, it violates one of their commandments.
If there happens to be any reader of my blog who feels this is a Judeo-Christian nation, and also feels the flag should be a sacred object — I’d enjoy hearing a comment on how these two positions aren’t in conflict with each other.

Some professor has decided there are 16 reasons people are drawn to religion. I wish he had come up with 2 more.

One of the more common questions I get asked about Judaism by friends, acquaintances is: what makes a pickle Kosher?  Here’s the explanation. Now you know.

Tuesday I sent a fifty page proposal to the State Government to request some money. That’s part of my job. Whenever I write a proposal for the state or federal government, they have these long documents explaining in excruciating detail everything that must be in the proposal, and how it should be formatted. (Spacing, font, margins, number of pages, color of ink, thickness of paper, number of syllables per sentence, whether or not alliteration is allowed….ok, I may be confusing some of the restrictions in certain poetic forms with government proposal restrictions. There are similarities.)

Anyway, this proposal was more focused on environmental concerns than many I’ve seen. They wanted us to minimize the use of non-recyclable materials. Which is great. They also wanted the submission double-sided. Now, I do understand the theory behind this…it uses half the paper, right? Wrong. It uses 1.5 times the paper. Because the printer doesn’t print out double-sided. You’ve got to print out the proposal once single-sided, then copy it to double-sided. So instead of saving paper, this requirement wastes it. Then, of course, they wanted five copies.

Of course, we gave them what they wanted. Always give the government what they want, or you might end up in Guantanamo. Or, worse, your proposal might be rejected and you won’t get the money.

Laughter is sunshine; it chases winter from the human face.

- Victor Hugo (Les Miserables)

Lady who Sells the Toys you Won’t Find at FAO Schwartz (or Toy Lady for short) obtained a large number of passes to the Westport Funny Bone. Piano Teacher, Mr. Star Wars, S-disturber, Mad Photographer, and 007 all showed up, as did Pagan Boy with a Mini, Vegetarian Librarian, The Wrestler, and The Wrestler’s Wife. Those good with math will see there were 11 people, as I was naturally there too. We ate dinner at Casa Gallardo prior to the show (next door to the Funny Bone) and sojourned for a few minutes at a blues bar that is also next door to the Funny Bone afterwards.

The only problem with huge groups sitting around tables is you don’t always get to talk to everyone as much as you’d like. But it was a fun evening. I even got a chance to sit in Pagan Boy’s new red mini at the end of the evening. The steering wheel is on the right side of the car. As I don’t know how to drive a stick shift, he won’t let me get behind the wheel. Probably a good idea.

Some of you may be wondering where I met all these freaks. (As we are all freaks: One of us! One of us!). It dates back to 1991 when I attended a science fiction convention and brought home a flyer for a local Star Trek fan club. I filled out the form and sent it in. It may have been one of the biggest errors of judgment in my life… The USS Discovery is still in existence today, and the chapter of Starfleet Intl recently celebrated its 20th anniversary. I’m its current Commanding Officer.

The only other major group of friends I hang out with are those members of my writer’s group, Writers Under the Arch, and those who attend the Hartford Coffee Company open mic. But it provides for an interesting group of friends.

The Wrestler really is a wrestler who has wrestled professionally - but on the regional circuits and not with WWE. The Mad Photographer took 500 pictures over 2 days at Renfaire, and I know he went back to Shakespeare in the Park Thurssday night because Wednesday night he showed up too late for the Green Show prior to the play, and he wanted pictures of that.

I’m hopeful no one dislikes the name I have chosen for them, if they happen to learn of it.

Wikipedia’s entry on the Cento has some more information:

The rules for the Cento were written down by a Roman poet named Decimus Magnus Ausonius (circa 310-395).

The poem may be derived from work by the same poet, or from several. It appears one popular challenge was to rewrite Bible verses (Old and New Testament) using Virgil’s Aeneid. Verses (lines of poetry) may be used either in their entirety, or divided in two; one half to be connected with another half from elsewhere. Two consecutive verses should never be used, nor should less than half a verse.

Cento also works with prose. The recent controversy with the Havard student’s book comes to mind, but whether her actions were intentional or not, they differed from a cento in three major ways. 1) She made changes to the words. The changes weren’t significant enough to counteract plagiarism charges, but they were still changes. 2) She added original material between the sections of copied material. At least, I assume she did. Cento uses only the words from the original sources. You can not add your own. 3) She didn’t credit the sources. That’s what makes cento and found poetry legitimate — the author admits to what they are doing, and gives credit where credit is due. The Fair Use provision of the US Copyright Law (and likely similar provisions in International Copyright Law) allows for usage of copyrighted material within some guidelines. But you can still end up in court arguing with an author over whether you crossed the fair use boundaries, so it’s safer to use public domain sources.

Interpreting Ausonius’s rules for prose, it seems to me appropriate to replace a verse with a sentence. In instances where a full sentence isn’t used, it seems appropriate to insist upon a full clause, whether it be dependent or independent. But this is my interpretation.

Here’s a brief section of dialogue I stitched together over the past hour (it uses material that is definitely still under copyright, and if JKR or any of her publishers ask me to remove this from my website, I will do so, but I do feel it falls within fair usage.)

“Now! ^{(SS p. 9)}” Ron’s flask exploded. ^{(HBP p. 515)} Harry gave a hollow laugh. ^{(PoA p. 78)} “Excellent!” ^{(GoF p. 270)}

The clanging doorbell rang again. ^{(OoP p. 106)} Harry stared at it. ^{(HBP p. 339)}

The office door opened. ^{(CoS P. 207)} It was Quirrell. ^{(SS p. 288)}

Harry’s mind had gone blank with shock. ^{(PoA p. 332)} He strode across the room towards the stairs; he half expected Ron to stop him, he would even have liked Ron to throw a punch at him, but Ron just stood there in his too-small pajamas. ^{(GoF p. 336)}

I don’t claim the above is perfect.  I spent an hour on it, and it’s not an easy task.  This illustrates how beneficial it might be with prose to relax one of the rules of Cento and allow for changing names. While I feel the progression of the sentences above work, they could be slightly confusing if you are familiar with the characters from the original.

SS = Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone
CoS = HP and the Chamber of Secrets
PoA = HP and the Prisoner of Azkaban
GoF = HP and the Goblet of Fire
OoP = HP and the Order of the Phoenix
HBP = HP and the Half Blood Prince

The Piano Teacher and the Mad Photographer joined me this evening in Forest Park to watch Julius Caesar. Others were expected to show, but last minute items must have pulled them away. Between the three of us, we split 2 bottles of port. (Same port as that which I brought to Hermann. It was from Inheritance Valley.)

Sitting behind us was a group containing someone who recognized me from the Hartford Coffee Company open mic. He said he had played guitar a few times, but I admitted I didn’t recognize him. I’ll recognize him next time. He and his companions were kind enough to move some of their baskets and food items to make more room for us.

Coincidentally the play reminded me of some research I had been doing over the past few days on poetic forms. I’ve been looking into the legalities behind ‘found poetry’ which takes words from one source, and without adding, subtracting, or changing the order of the words, reformats the words onto the page as a poem. Basically, the legalities are highly questionable, unless one gets permission from the source.

However, I discovered a similar form which I have written in the past without realizing it. That is, I came up with the form on my own without realizing it was already an established form. I thought it would be neat if I took a whole bunch of lines from different Shakespearean plays and combine them together into a poem. The method I used, if I remember correctly, was to open a copy of Bartlett’s Familiar Quotations, and jot down every quote from Shakespeare that looked useful. And then I looked at my choices and started mixing and matching.

This is a cento.

A “cento” is a Roman poetic form meaning “stitched together”: each line of the poem is drawn from a different source.

Usually the different sources are different authors, and my example (shown below) doesn’t always change sources with the line breaks. I also slightly modified the text in a couple places. But I wasn’t tryiing to write a cento. I didn’t know what a cento was at the time. I was just experimenting. What I did comes close enough though. I wrote it in 1995.

Shakespeare Said it, Not Me!

1. She is beautiful, and therefore to be woo’d
2. That man that hath a tongue, I say is no man,
3. If with his tongue he cannot win a woman
4. Bid me discourse, I will enchant thine ear

5. See! How she leans her cheek upon her hand
6. O! That I were a glove upon that hand,
7. That I might touch that cheek. The very pink of courtesy.
8. Bless thee, Bottom! Bless Thee!
9. You are sir Orifice
10. And when you Ope your lips let no dog bark
11. Things sweet to taste prove in digestion sour
12. I never heard so musical a discord, such sweet thunder

13. O Tiger’s heart wrapped in a woman’s hide!
14. Your words are razors to my wounded heart
15. My ventures are not in one bottom trusted!
16. Give me another horse! Bind up my wounds!

Postscript to my critics:
17. Was ever woman in this humor woo’d?
18. Tis not my speeches that you do mislike
19. But tis my presence that doth trouble ye.

Line 1: Henry VI, Part 1, Act V, sc. V.
Line 2-3: The Two Gentlemen of Verona Act III Sc I
Line 4: Venus and Adonis. Line 145
Line 5-7: Romeo and Juliet. Act II Sc II
Line 7: Romeo and Juliet. Act II Sc IV
Line 8: A Midsummer Night’s Dream. Act III Sc I.
Line 9-10: A Merchant of Venice. Act I Sc I. (Slight alteration of text. ‘I’ to ‘you’ and ‘oracle’ to ‘orifice’.)
Line 11: Richard II. Act I Sc III.
Line 12: A Midsummer Night’s Dream. Act IV Sc I.
Line 13: Henry VI, Part 3, Act I, sc. IV
Line 14: Titus Andronicus. Act I Sc. I (’these words’ changed to ‘your words’)
Line 15. Merchant of Venice. Act I Sc. I.
Line 16: King Richard III. Act V. Sc. III.
Line 17: King Richard III. Act I. Sc II.
Line 18-19: Henry VI Part II. Act 1 Sc. I.

Some centos play off the Latin word for 100 as well, and are 100 lines. It gives me a challenge for a new poem.

I spent Saturday afternoon/evening in Hermman, stopped in Wentzville on my way back Sunday.
Awholecanofplot wrote about her experience in Hermann, in which I am mentioned. I like how she comes up with creative names for everyone instead of just using their initials. Let’s see if I can do that.

Mr. Exploding Eyeball disappointed several people by failing to bring anything of his to read by the bonfire, but he promised to bring something next time. Next time is likely to be a month from now.

The Professor shared an epistulary piece that’s been recently published — it’s a series of letters between two mad scientists with an unexpected and hilarious conclusion.

There was a lot of music. In addition to The Harpist, there were several drums, and Mr. Smiling Cow was convinced to sing a couple songs acapella. The Creative Problem Solver had to leave early, but she started off the bonfire.
I’m not a big fan of tents, suffering from a mild form of claustrophobia, and I had expected to be sleeping under the stars, but others in the group insisted that would be stupid as the dew would make the evening uncomfortable. I thought that my sleeping bag was what would keep me dry, but room was found for me on the floor of one of the rooms in the guest house., and I couldn’t deny that that would be better accomodations.

I drank more than I needed to, but I was able to sleep it off, and was fine in the morning. There was an amazing breakfast spread equal to that of dinner, and it was definitely not a good weekend for my diet. I left for Wentzville about 10, and pulled into the park at 11.

Renfaire was fun. The Piano Teacher, Mr. Star Wars, S-Disturber, The Mad Photographer, 007, Scrapbook Lady, and Thing One and Thing Two were all in attendance. Thing One and Thing Two tired quickly, so 007 and Scrapbook Lady took them home before the day was over. Mr. Star Wars also didn’t last, and left in his X-Wing. The rest of us made it through closing ceremonies and a rousing rendition of Nothing Quite Like a Moose.
I ended up purchasing two performer CDs. Vince Conaway and Elvendrums.

By the way….I got lost on the way to Hermann.  Briefly.  I was looking for Route H and found this sign:

I was expecting to see a sign with an H on it, so I assumed when I did find one, that was the sign I needed.  I didn’t pay attention to the fact that the color was blue.  So once I found the hospital I had to backtrack.

But I thought of those who were looking for a hospital, and ended up driving down Route H…and I decided that was one road sign they really ought to spell out the entire word.

.Plans were an early form of blogging for some college students, including myself. That was a long time ago. But .plans lasted longer than I thought.

In the days of old, Grinnell College had a Vax computer system. One of the standard commands available on this system was called ‘finger’. This command gave various information about a user, including showing the person’s .plan file. Each user had their own .plan file, which was originally meant for people at companies and elsewhere to post what their work plans were. The .plan file at Grinnell College (and many other places) gained a social aspect however. People started posting notes to their friends, writing stories, or writing whatever else they felt like writing. At Grinnell College, a small group of students called the ‘VAXGods’ wrote and maintained scripts to allow users to automatically keep track of which of their friends had updated their .plan files.

During the summer of 2000, the Vax at Grinnell College was phased out of operation.

Naturally, a few students were upset about being .planless, and created a web-based version. (see link above) Apparently alumni are welcome, but I browsed through the user listing and didn’t recognize anyone. Sigh.

Well, here is what my .plan for the weekend might have looked like yesterday:

Friday night I’m heading to the open mic at Hartford, and will then join everyone for the after-gathering at R’s. Saturday morning I am headed to Hermann where I will spend all day with some writer’s group friends, and will spend the night at a farm in the area. Sunday morning I will drive back, but will stop in Wentzville for RenFaire.

Sounds fun? I thought so.

Last night (Friday) upon exiting Hartford, I got in my car, and it wouldn’t start. I have AAA, but I also had a lot of friends there who are capable with cars, so they jumped it for me. I drove it around for about 20 minutes, and ended up at R’s to join everyone a bit late for the after-gathering. Upon turning off the ignition, I could hear it die. This time I called AAA. I had them jump-start the car rather than tow it. I knew it would just die again, most likely, but I drove it to a Dobbs service station within walking distance of my home. A few months ago they provided a friend who had a flat tire with great customer service prior to a day-trip and I had decided the next time i was in need of some car service I’d use them. I didn’t recall ever using Dobbs prior, but they were convenient for me, and now I knew they were good too.

I walked in my door at about 12:45 am. I walked back to Dobbs this morning. It’s a 30 minute walk. They opened at 7 I managed to get there by 7:45. They asked me for my license plate number. I told them. They plugged it into the computer, and came up with my name. I nodded. I had no recollection ever using Dobbs before. “Yes.” I said, hesitantly. “xxx-xxxx?” they asked, reciting my phone number. “Yes.” I said. “Olds Cutlass?” they asked. “No.” I laughed.

Does anybody reading this remember my Olds Cutlass? I think there might be one or two. As near as I can tell, my family doesn’t read this, so that limits the possibilities. It was a wonderful car. The first car I ever owned. Before that I drove a hand-me-down car from my father which I destroyed in an incident with a fire truck. I had a green light, and I swear I didn’t hear a siren. Anyway…The Olds Cutlass was a beaut. Several years old when I got it, it’s dashboard was completely electronic, and completely dead during the last year or so. “How fast was I going? I don’t know, officer.” How much gas did I have left? I filled up every couple days so it didn’t matter. It even passed inspection!

Anyway, that was 2 cars ago, and I gave the guy at Dobbs my current information. He said he’d call me after they’re done looking at it.
I stopped at St. Louis Bread Co for breakfast on my way home. Had a great spinach and artichoke souffle. 480 cal, 30g fat. 12 points on the WW scale, which is half a day’s worth. But with all the extra stressing and walking I’ve been doing this weekend, I earned it.
So…am I going to make it to Hermann sometime today? Wentzville tomorrow? Will I be bumming a ride with one of my friends to both/either? Stay tuned.

update it’s been an hour since I made the above post.  Dobbs just called.  My car should be ready within about 45 minutes.  I estimate if everything flows smoothly from here, I should be in Hermann by 2 pm.   Slightly shorter day than I planned, but could have been worse.  And my 3 year old car will have a new battery.