RIP, Mary Travers, age 72

Tourist Pushed Off Cliff by Monkey

A holidaymaker is suing her travel agents after she was pushed off a cliff by a monkey in China…

Not that it should be a requirement, of course, but it is impressive.

Filk music = folk music for narrow values of ‘o’.
or Filk music = science fiction/fantasy related music.

One common sub-genre is the parody song which changes the lyrics to a well-known song — often for humor. (e.g. Weird Al’s song ‘Yoda’.)

Here’s a filk I wrote last night

If I had a Phaser
©2009 John C Newmark
(To the tune of If I had a Hammer, by Pete Seeger and Lee Hays)

If I had a phaser
I’d fire at the Klingons
I’d fire at the Cardies
All over the quad
I’d fire with pleasure
I’d fire without warning
I’d fire out war against the Klingons and the Cardies
All over the quad

If I had a sword
I’d strike it at the Klingons
I’d strike it at the Cardies
All over the quad
I’d strike with pleasure
I’d strike without warning
I’d strike out war against the Klingons and the Cardies
All over the quad

If I had a song
I’d sing it at the Klingons
I’d sing it at the Cardies
All over the quad
I’d sing with pleasure
I’d sing without warning
I’d sing out war against the Klingons and the Cardies
All over the quad

Well I’ve got a phaser
And I’ve got a sword
And I’ve got a song to sing
All over the quad
It’s the phaser of Starfleet
It’s the sword of Sulu
It’s the song about war against the Klingons and the Cardies
All over the quad

I can hear dozens of conspiracy theorists going *oh shit* right now.

Abstract (excerpt):

We investigate the efficacy of three aluminum helmet designs on a sample group of four individuals. Using a $250,000 network analyser, we find…certain frequencies are in fact greatly amplified. These amplified frequencies coincide with radio bands reserved for government use according to the Federal Communication Commission (FCC). Statistical evidence suggests the use of helmets may in fact enhance the government’s invasive abilities.

MIT study

A few possibilities to consider:

1) Since tinfoil craze began, government agents with either a sense of humor, or evil nature, altered their frequencies to be amplified by tinfoil?
2) Government agents have paid MIT students to ‘produce a study’ that will encourage desired subjects to remove their tinfoil hats?
3) Tinfoil-hat wearing individuals chose poorly in their means of protection from the start?

As some know, I am the creator behind Victor Hugo Central which is a somewhat heavily visited research site. During the school year.

Google Analytics provides proof that the summer is over.

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